The Rules

14 Aug

Dear Pregnancy:

As we start our third round, I think it’s fair that we establish some ground rules this time around.

  1. I don’t mind the morning sickness so much, considering the fact that I didn’t gain any weight the last two times.  Let’s agree that if I’m going to puke every day for the next nine months, that not only will I NOT gain any weight, but that I will lose some.
  2. I understand you like to hit me with the sudden urge to pee just as I get comfortable in bed.  I’ll accept that.  But maybe you can forgo the hemorrhoids – those I can definitely do without.
  3. Each time you like to throw me a curveball and give me some strange ailment like Carpal Tunnel Syndrome and Restless Leg Syndrome.  Maybe this time you can be nice and give me Beautiful Skin Syndrome or Eat All the Ranch Dip You Want Syndrome.
  4. I’ll try to lay off the chili cheese fries and you be nice with the Acid Reflux.
  5. I’m all about the scheduled c-section.  Try not to let my water break and put me into labor before the scheduled date.  I’ve gone 2 pregnancies without one iota of labor, I’m ready to make it 3 for 3.
  6. I know last pregnancy we had a lot going on.  I’m trying to avoid the stress this year for both of us.  I’ll do what I can to ensure we don’t have any cancer scares or have to move again.

I think that sounds fair.  Don’t you?  And I think this is the last time we’ll have to go through all of this, so let’s make it a pleasant affair.




5 Responses to “The Rules”

  1. Mary Ann August 14, 2008 at 3:29 pm #

    Sounds more than fair, to me. And in keeping with my tradition to shower mom since second and third babies can share with number one — your shower gift is enroute, and early this time — just like your pregnancy! Have Andrew swing by the p.o. box next week. Hope I guessed the right size 🙂 And I say strike a better deal with Baby 3 — you don’t need to puke this time — I’m hoping this one’s NICER to you !

    Cool, we’ll check the PO this week.

  2. looksgoodinpolkadots August 14, 2008 at 9:09 pm #

    That made me chuckle!

    If it makes you feel any better… pregnancy two was much worse than three for me. Not sure why… but it was! Maybe you’ll be blessed as well.

    A-men to the scheduled c-sections… some of us don’t work like we are suppose to… spare us that extra trauma!

    Bring on the C! I had a lot of factors that caused the first one, and it was the same with #2. Since I have the same doctor, I’m sure he’ll go 3 for 3.

  3. fightingwindmills August 15, 2008 at 5:56 am #

    I love that you wrote a letter to your pregnancy. I hope you get what you asked for! That’s such a good idea. I would definitely write a letter to my pregnancy if I am ever pregnant again. I didn’t think to do it with the first two. Maybe a sense of humor factors in once you’re experiencing it for the third time.

    If I didn’t have a sense of humor, I’d be in big trouble!

  4. morethananelectrician August 15, 2008 at 10:53 am #

    For my wife the second one was the worst, other than being pregnant and the end of the summer months for the first two didn’t help (late July and early August births) the third wasa December birth and it went well for everyone.

    Nice TRY with the rules…doesn’t work that way!

    I’ve heard that #3 is easier than #2 from a lot of people. Hopefully it will be that way with me too!

  5. Susan August 27, 2008 at 9:28 pm #

    I can totally relate to you on some respects. My third pregnancy was a doozy. I had two “normal” pregnancies and then a very traumatic third. But Sam is here and I am alive (there was a chance that both of us could have not made it). But depsite all this, I think, oh, I can do it again! My sanity must slip out of my body with all the amniotic fluid. hang in there!

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